Thursday, June 29, 2006


Hey, guess what people? I saw Dr. Happy-go-lucky today!
I walked into the office (I didn't have a real appointment), and about 15 minutes later Nurse Sweet called out my name. (I must add that I never wait less than an hour when I have an appointment there. No joke. I can read a whole book while waiting. So I consider myself very lucky today.) Nurse sweet quided me into Dr. HGL's office, where I plopped myself down and read for a good half hour. (But I was in her office-no one was getting ahead of me.) (Boy am I overusing the brakets today or what?!)
Enter Doctor. She sat down and discussed the cycle. I whipped out my list, and pinned her down for some answers. Here's what what we decided:

1. I will go straight to the hospital for a blood test-do not pass go, do not collect $200.00. (I have to go to the hospital if I want a free blood test. It's just up the hill from the office, so I don't mind. And the wait isn't too bad.) She ordered a beta (which we know will be neg,) and some other stuff that I will post about when I get the results.

2. Asked about ultrasound to check that there are not cysts. She told me that if I had OHSS that I would know. She is not concerned that with my past dose of 50mg clomid that this would have occured. I did read R's story over at The Uterine Grail, and yes I am a bit freaked out, but I am goign with my Dr. on this one for this cycle.

3. Talked about Provera to end this cycle. I told the Dr. that my Homeopath suggested homeopathic provera, and she was cool with this. I told her I would give it a shot, and if my period didn't come in 2 weeks then I would take the drugs. She was interested, and wanted me to keep her posted on whether or not it did the trick. (Good response from a doctor, as docotr's in general do not "believe" in homeopathy.)

4. Talked about my previous blood tests. She showed me the lab report, and yes the number did look fine. Like really fine. She doesn't see a reason to retest right now. I am still shoked by these levels.

5. Dr. HGL provided me with a requisition for a semen analysis for The C (who is currently on vacation- wait till he gets home to hear about this!!) She told me very seriously: "You MUST abstain for 3 days prior to the test!" Aye, Aye, Boss.

6. When period arrives I will take my 100mg of Clomid like a good girl. Then I will have sex on a schedule. With my husband. And chances are it won't be good. (The Sex.) Because when you have to have it, generally that is the case. It stresses me out that I might get pregnant from non-passionate sex. I know, I'm a freak. But I also realize that means that I am thinking that I actually might get pregnant from having sex, period. A woman can hope, can't she?

I left the office feeling light hearted, a little fancy free, even. I know! Weird! I'm not sure what came over me! The McDonald's next door beckoned me and I succomed to a McFlurry. I couldn't resist, people! Could NOT resist! Besides, I needed the energy to walk up the hill. It's a trek! And it's hot out! I got to the blood clinic, and there was but one person in line ahead of me, Oh, the day was getting even better! "Next" called the guy (let's call him Idiot.) I hand Idiot my form, my hospital card and my medicare card. He enters my info and looks up at me (slobbering away at my last spoonfuls of McFlurry) and says: "oh, so you're pregnant!" (Ok, everyone who just fell of their seats, back on your chairs so that you can read the rest of my story.) I resisted all urges to grab Idiot my the nutsack, whip his balls around his anus and pull them up to stuff in his mouth, and repied: "No, thanks, but I don't think so." TO WHICH HE HAD THE AUDACITY TO REPY: "Oh, I think you aaaaaare!" (In a sing song voice.)

I have a couple of issues here.

First: who trained this guy? I mean really! It is not his place to comment on the type of test I am getting. It is his job to enter my information into a computer, for the love of all things holy! What if I was getting an HIV test? would he have said: "Oh, so you have AIDS!" I mean, COME THE FUCK ON!

Second: What on earth would actually make him think that I was pregnant in the first place. Granted, I am no small girl (I am a good 40 pounds overweight), but I certainly do not look pregnant. Chubby, yes. Volumptuous, ok. But certainly not pregnant. (And don't non-pregnant women eat McFlurrys?)

Third: What if I didn't want to be pregnant? What if I was raped and I was having this test to see if I had conceived like that? WHAT IF? I think that would be almost a million times worse that being infertile and having a beta, knowing that of course you can't be pregnant, you're infertile.

Fourth: The fact of the matter is that I KNOW that I am not pregnant. And I really wish that I was. And that having this test means another failed month, another day I have to wait. Taking this test is just a medical confirmation of the shit that I already know about. And it fucking sucks.

This Idiot was really lucky that toady I decided to wear my thick skin.


Nico said...

Dr. HGL sounds marvellous. The idiot? Not so much. I completely agree that he was *totally* out of line. Perhaps worth calling his manager about if you feel so inclined. Completely unprofessional. You would have been totally justified in ripping him a new one - I'm impressed that you didn't!!

Sunnie said...

What a good doc appt...and in such a short time :)

Can you talk a bit more about homeopathic provera?

the waiting line said...

you packed more f-bombs and nut sack references in a post than I've seen in a long time. I just found your blog & you're my new hero! ;-) lol.

sorry about the jerk at McDs, and glad your doc is a good one.

Meg said...

UGh, what an idiot.. I want to punch him jusst hearing about it. It's as if you went to the supermarket and they made some comment about your low-fat milk or something. How OFFENSIVE.

Otherwise.. it's good to hear there's progress hapening Ms C. And that your doc is open to alternative medicine. That's great.

ms. c said...

Ok people, I must make this clear:
It wasn't the guy at McD's who made this comment (where in I would have told HIM to fuckrightoff-really I would-ask any of my friends,) but the idiot was the intake guy at the blood clinic-hello!
Ach, what an IDIOT.

Angie said...

Sounds like you had a good appointment with your doc. That's great! Sorry about the idiot behind the computer.. Someone needs to tell him not to say stuff like that! I think you showed great restraint on your part by not yelling vulgarities in his face!

ChicagoGirl said...

It's great your appointment with Dr. HGL went so well. It sounds like he's really listening to you which is great. Too bad about that freak at the hospital -- I'm amazed at your restraint in not yelling at him right then and there.

Mary Ellen and Steve said...

It sounds like you have a great doctor. I can't believe that the guy at the lab. What an asshole! I don't think that people like this have any place in the medical profession.

ellie said...

Yup. You are a far far nicer person than I am- I'd have ripped him a new one! I actually had that same comment when I went into the ER earlier this month. Fortunately the IVF drugs mess with the tests so I just had to say the 3 magic letters...I.V.F. and everyone takes a step away from the hormonal lady :)
Thanks for visiting my blog- and I am so glad the visit with the doc went well!

Just another Jenny said...

I've just read through your posts to get caught up. I am sorry about the guy at the blood clinic - some people are just too stupid! I am lucky to have a clinic that does just IVF patients in the morning so they know why we are there.

Jennie said...

I'm so glad you had a good informative appointment, too bad it only takes one jerk to ruin the day!

At least you had the power of the McFlurry to help get you through! Although I prefer DQ Peanut Buster Parfaits myself.

~r said...

Oooh, you were much nicer to that jerk than he deserved!

And I didn't mean to make you freaked about OHSS - it's honestly really rare, especially on clomid.

Angie said...

I wanted to wish you an happy 4th weekend and to let you know that you have been tagged!

VanillaDreams said...

No.He.DIDN'T!!!!! OMG. Talk about falling of your chair...I almost choked on my water when I read what that IDIOT at the lab said to you!!!

Seriously, WTF?!?!?!

You really need to report him to the management, for all the reasons why you already stated!

On the positive side, I'm glad your Dr. appt went well and you got some answers! That's fantastic!

And I think you have now inspired me to seek out a Starbucks Frappucino, or some other equally bad-for-me delight today!! ;)

GZ said...

I am appalled and truly offended for you, but glat to hear that the doctor went so great. (Minus dickweed)

My Reality said...

OMG!!! I think if the guy at the hospital had said that to me I would have freaked out and told him where to go! Or perhaps broken down with sobbing hysterics and told him that I couldn't be pregnant for all of the following reasons and start listing off all of our fertility issues!