UNTITLED

I can't even stand to look at my ticker.

This waiting past the due date business is sheer agony. Mental and physical.

Every night when I go to sleep I think: this could be my last baby-free night, try to get as much sleep as possible, you may not sleep for another 18 years.

Then alas, the next night comes.

This has been such an emotionally draining week with the death of my grandfather followed by the shiva. I have been pretty low-key during the whole pregnancy... I didn't really talk about it much, it was just something that was happening inside my body. This week with all the visitors around I have had so many people touch me and give me advice that I am about to go batty.

If one more person tells me how great I look for being past my due date (I feel like shit, quite frankly), or give me advice on how to bring on labour I may throttle him or her. (Oh, and to the one person who told me about her full episiotomy- fuck you.)

I've tried nipple stimulation, we've had plenty of sex, we've walked around the block several times in bitter cold weather, I have worked like a maniac in the kitchen, and have nested so much that birds are about to move in.

Oh ya, and I've tried talking very nicely to the little guy pleading with him to come out. And it appears that he isn't listening to his mama. So tell me, why would he listen to a strange who is bending down to talk him into coming out of my belly?!

Ya... I'm a little bit at the end of my rope.

The problem is that I don't really want to be induced, so I'm left in a bit of a catch-22. I have an OB appointment today. I'm interested to see if there is any action down there. Will keep you posted of course.

Just to bring this down a notch: Thank you so much for all your wishes on my grandfather's death. It means so much to me to read your comments and to have your support. You guys are all amazing.