Tuesday, October 23, 2007

IT’S A...

Before we get to that, there’s tons more to talk about.

First on the agenda: You Wonderful Folks.
Your support over the past couple of days has been unbelievable. I know I have said it countless times already, but I don’t know what I would do without you guys. It means so much to me that you are here for me- to lend a comforting word or some really thoughtful advice. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Point number two: Yesterday’s OB Appointment
Putting it all into perspective, if we eliminate the stress of the screen results, yesterday’s appointment was pretty standard and uneventful. Wait for eons, go into exam room, wait for a bit longer (but be thankful that I am not sitting there naked but for a sheet of paper), doctor enters, listens to beautiful heartbeat, the end.

So we got all that (oh, the wonderful heartbeat and movement sounds of our baby!!), plus a discussion of our screen results, which included some straight talk from the doctor.

And alas, third of all: The Decisions
I know I sounded pretty adamant in my last post about no further testing. Over the next day or so, I started to rethink my position. Your comments and email exchanges were really helpful in showing me various points of view. I began to understand something that I previously hadn’t thought about (until now I really had hoped I would never have to think about any of this…): I certainly wouldn’t love my baby less if he was born with Down’s, but it would be in my and his best interest to know and be prepared upon his birth.

This, coupled with our OB pointing out to us that the risk of miscarrying due to having the amnio was actually higher than our risk of Down’s started to make the picture very clear. Plus, our OB noted, the rate of miscarriage from amnio of the particular doctor who would be performing the test was actually in the range of 1/2000 to 1/3000. The doctor was able to fit us in this morning (moving our ultrasound up one week.) Our doctor also told us that we still had the evening to think about it some more: upon arrival at the ultrasound clinic we could inform them that we were just going to have the ultrasound and not the amnio.

Par for the course, I didn’t sleep all night. Though my husband and I had made up our minds, the thought of doing the procedure, and the possibility of miscarrying was weighing on me heavily. The way I have written it makes it seem like the process was straight-forward. In truth, the last 5 days have been a special sort of hell reminiscent of my years dealing with infertility. In the end (and I am saying this now, no matter what happens), I know that we made the decision that was best for us.

I won’t go into details about the procedure this morning- it’s something I would sooner rather forget (not so much due to the pain, but for the emotional upheaval.) I haven’t had any bleeding, fluid leaking, or strong cramps. I am feeling confident at this later time of the day that nothing bad is going to happen. Now we just have to sit tight for the results which won’t be available for another 2-4 weeks. Results which won’t change how much I love my baby, but will redirect my prenatal research from strollers and cloth diapers to, well, other more important things.

As for the actual ultrasound? Our sweet baby was a beautiful as ever: moving, waving, breathing and hiccupping. Everything measured perfectly; we saw his little bones growing, his 4 heart chambers and his brain hemispheres. The C also saw signs that he is already a fan of is soccer (er, football) team, Porto.

You may have noticed over the weeks that I have always used “him”, “he”, and “his” in a generic sort of way. Today we saw for sure. We will be painting our little room navy and lime, and my mother is already planning the bris. You all, of course, are invited.

And last: Thank you to my wonderful C. Your love and support are never ending, and for this I am eternally grateful. I know I couldn’t have made it through the past few days without you.

(Please, if you know me IRL, keep all this info to yourself. We don’t think that we are going to tell many people.)

24 comments:

Shauna said...

I'm sitting tight here with you. You are in my thoughts Ms. C.

And... YAY! a boy! Congrats to you.

Samantha said...

Congrats on the boy!!!!

I'm glad that you were able to come to decision that you and The C feel comfortable with. Here's to having the wait for the results go by quickly and having the results come back showing no problems!

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking good thoughts too. Congrats on your footie star - maybe our kids will be on the same team! (little joke there, as Aberdeen FC is pretty, well, terrible)

Anonymous said...

Congrats on your little boy!!

I'm glad to hear that you come to a decision that was right for you.

You'll be in my thoughts during this wait.

Em from Australia

Aurelia said...

Congrats on a boy!

And the ultrasound news is very good. Since they know your numbers, they would've looked very very carefully for any signs of fetal anomalies and since they didn't stop you, and forbid you from leaving...that's fabulous news!

And yes, those amnio risk numbers are variable depending on the person doing the amnio and the facility. I bet your guy was the best of the best.

Hopefully you guys will get your final answer in 2-4 weeks and can breathe a sigh of relief.

Geohde said...

:)

Congrats on the boy-gendered one.

I hope that the amnio brings you good news, truly.

J

Somewhat Ordinary said...

Yay, welcome to the boy mommy club! I'm thinking good thoughts for you, Mr. C and your son.

Kate said...

Congrats!!!

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your little boy! I hope that the amnio only brings good news. Hugs.

Anonymous said...

Wow. It's really happening! I'm so glad that things look good with the newest porto fan (G-d forbid he doesn't like football!)....you sound good, too, my friend...i wish you weren't having to go through all of this but you guys are doing great...wonderful parents already!
sending you lots of love!
peace
shlomit

Anonymous said...

Keeping you in my thoughts.

decemberbaby said...

Wow, a boy! That's wonderful! I'll see you at the bris ;-)

I'm glad the amnio went uneventfully. Hopefully the next 2-4 weeks just fly by and you get the good news we all want you to hear!

Ann said...

Wow. What a lot to take in. First of all, congrats on the boy! Second of all, that was very brave of you to go through with the amnio. My biggest hope for you now is that you can try to put it out of your mind for the next few weeks (yeah right!). Sending lots of love your way.

es said...

Ugh just when you thought 2ww were over.... I wish you a wait as stress-free as can be. I'm glad that you came to a decision that you seem to be at peace with, and glad that the sonogram went well.

Erin said...

Being a mommy to a boy is the most incredible thing in the world--you are going to be head-over-heels in love with everything he does. And hearing your son say "I love you, Mama" is the most wonderful sound in the world.

I'm glad you came up with a decision that you and the C felt good about. I agree that knowing ahead of time can be good for preparation purposes. I hope everything is fine and that this will ease your mind and heart.

Watson said...

Congrats on having a little boy...how exciting!

I am sending you good thoughts for both a quick recovery from the test and for good results. Sounds like you made the right decision and I'm hoping all goes well.

XOXO

Anonymous said...

Many many good thoughts - look after yourself. And congratulations on your son!

Alison said...

Congratulations!

Heather said...

Congrats on the boy!! Boys are so much fun!! Oh and I'm keeping my fingers crossed for good results!!

Carrie said...

How unfair to have to make a decision like this after struggling to be in this place. You surely deserve a stress free pregnancy.
I know you will love your son, no matter what, but I think knowing is always better than not knowing.
I'm thinking of you and hoping for a great conclusion to this chapter xx

Anonymous said...

Congrats on the little boy!

I hope the next few weeks pass quickly and you get answers. I am sorry you are dealing with this. It just isn't fair.

Eggs Akimbo said...

A little boy! Wonderful! I too am Em from Australia.

Krista said...

Boys are awesome! Sorry you are having to deal with uncertainty and more waiting, it is so cruel. I wish you only the very best news.

Aurelia said...

Okay, we're all dying in suspense here.

Update with something, please?